I’m at a point in my life where I really should have a purpose…. a job… a raison d’etre.
My pal, Roscoe, works at his Buddy’s bar as a greeter and general patron counselor. I don’t have much of a tolerance for alcohol – or alcoholic conversation – so that’s probably not my calling.
I’ve considered a career as a massage school practice body. I don’t know if that’s an actual job, but I’m very good a staying still for a long time as someone – anyone – rubs my belly, my back, my legs, my paws…. but, I digress.
The predecessor dog at my friend Lucy’s house – Wilson – was a Ninja and that sounds a little more exciting. Though I’m not big on wearing uniforms.
I read a book recently that gave me a great idea… I’ll become a Dog Detective!
“Dog On It” is the first in a series of Chet & Bernie mysteries, and I have found my match. Chet is a dog after my own heart. He is smart and sassy and a real dog’s dog, if you know what I mean. His sidekick is Bernie, a private investigator, and they have a lot of wonderful adventures…. most of which involve sniffing things and eating snacks and grabbing bad guys by the pant legs. Now here’s a job I could really sink my teeth into (pun intended).
There seem to be four important attributes to being a detective of either the canine or human variety.
- A good nose for sniffing out the facts and details of a case.
Seriously? Is anyone going to question a hound’s nose skills?
- Patience for waiting until just the right moment to surprise the bad guy.
I have perfected the patience thing, waiting interminably while my humans take forever to put on shoes for a hike, or look for car keys, or any number of amazingly slow activities.
- An ability to understand right from wrong.
Well, I must admit this one is a little tough, but I can work on it.
- A good detective also needs a sidekick.
Applications are now being accepted.
Until I take on my first case, though, I’ll just conserve my energy.